Longleaf Light Farms

LED-lit fiction from the longleaf belt

⚠️ This brand does not exist.

Longleaf Light Farms uses imaginary full-spectrum LED arrays to grow premium fictional cannabis in Alabama's most technologically advanced fake facility.

Flower

Products by Longleaf Light Farms

Longleaf Northern Lights

Longleaf Northern Lights

Flower / Indica

THC 18.5%

$38.00 / 1/8 oz

Alabama rarely sees the Northern Lights, but Longleaf Light Farms brings the ...

by Longleaf Light Farms

Longleaf Biscotti

Longleaf Biscotti

Flower / Indica

THC 24.5%

$51.00 / 1/8 oz

Nutty, sweet, and couch-locking in fictional Alabama, Longleaf Biscotti is th...

by Longleaf Light Farms

Longleaf Super Lemon Haze

Longleaf Super Lemon Haze

Flower / Sativa

THC 20.5%

$43.00 / 1/8 oz

Zesty and uplifting in the fictional sense, Longleaf Super Lemon Haze is a da...

by Longleaf Light Farms

Longleaf White Widow

Longleaf White Widow

Flower / Hybrid

THC 21.0%

$44.00 / 1/8 oz

Frosted in fictional trichomes like Spanish moss on an Alabama live oak. Long...

by Longleaf Light Farms

Satire Ends Here

While the rest of this site is a joke, cannabis prohibition is not funny. Opiates and hard drugs are devastating communities. Cannabis is not the enemy. Here's how to take real action in Alabama:

Advocacy Organizations

The nation's largest cannabis advocacy organization, working to reform marijuana laws since 1970.

Marijuana Policy Project National

The largest organization working to end marijuana prohibition in the US.

Contact Your US Senators

Federal legalization requires federal action. Tell your senators where you stand.

For state legislators, visit openstates.org — enter your address to find your representatives.

Other States Also Waiting for Legalization

Arkansas Fake Cannabis Finder

Florida Fake Cannabis Finder

Georgia Fake Cannabis Finder

Idaho Fake Cannabis Finder

Indiana Fake Cannabis Finder

Iowa Fake Cannabis Finder

Kansas Fake Cannabis Finder

Kentucky Fake Cannabis Finder

Louisiana Fake Cannabis Finder

Mississippi Fake Cannabis Finder

Nebraska Fake Cannabis Finder

New Hampshire Fake Cannabis Finder

North Carolina Fake Cannabis Finder

North Dakota Fake Cannabis Finder

Oklahoma Fake Cannabis Finder

Pennsylvania Fake Cannabis Finder

South Carolina Fake Cannabis Finder

South Dakota Fake Cannabis Finder

Tennessee Fake Cannabis Finder

Texas Fake Cannabis Finder

Utah Fake Cannabis Finder

West Virginia Fake Cannabis Finder

Wisconsin Fake Cannabis Finder

Wyoming Fake Cannabis Finder

FREE STATES — Where Adults Can Legally Enjoy Cannabis

These states chose freedom. Find real dispensaries at WeedStores.US.

Alaska Weed Stores

Arizona Weed Stores

California Weed Stores

California Weed Tasting

California Weed Tastings

California Weed Vacation

Colorado Weed Stores

Connecticut Weed Stores

Delaware Weed Stores

Florida (FL) Weed Stores

Hawaii Weed Stores

Illinois Weed Stores

Louisiana Weed Stores

MA Weed Stores.com

Maine Weed Stores

Maryland Weed Stores

Mendo Cannabis . farm

Mendo Cannabis . shop

Michigan Weed Stores

Minnesota Weed Stores

Mississippi (MISS) Weed Stores

Mississippi Weed Stores

Missouri Weed Stores

Montana Weed Stores

Nevada Weed Stores

Nevada Weed Stores

New Jersey Weed Stores

New Mexico Weed Stores

New York (NY) Weed Stores

New York Weed Stores

North Dakota Weed Stores

Ohio Weed Stores

Oregon Weed Stores

Pennsylvania (Penn) Weed Stores

Rhode Island Weed Stores

Sonoma Cannabis

Texas Weed Stores

Vermont Weed Stores

Virginia Weed Stores

Washington DC Weed Stores

Washington Weed Stores

⚠️ SATIRE DISCLOSURE

This is a work of political satire. All store names, brand names, products, and events on this site are entirely fictional. Any resemblance to real businesses is coincidental. No cannabis is sold here. This site exists to highlight the absurdity of prohibition and to connect people with real advocacy resources.

Powered by WeedStores.US

Questions or concerns? Contact us