Anniston Altitude Shop

⚠️ This dispensary does not exist.

Anniston's most altitude-aware fictional dispensary, perched metaphorically above Alabama's legal landscape. Currently imaginary, forever hopeful.

404 Fantasy Ridge Blvd, Anniston, AL 36201

256-555-1212 (not a real number)

Mon-Sat 10am-8pm, Sun Closed (imaginary hours)

Products at This Fake Store

Crimson Petal Purple Punch

Flower / Indica

THC 20.5%

$43.00 / 1/8 oz

A grape punch to the imagination in Indica form. Crimson Petal Purple Punch k...

by Crimson Harvest Farms

Magnolia London Pound Cake

Flower / Indica

THC 31.0%

$65.00 / 1/8 oz

Pound for pound Alabama's most densely fictional indica. Berry and citrus ton...

by Crimson Ridge Flower Co

Crimson Sunset Sherbet

Flower / Hybrid

THC 24.5%

$51.00 / 1/8 oz

Sherbet-sweet and colored like an Alabama sunset, Crimson Sunset Sherbet is a...

by Crimson Ridge Flower Co

Crimson Bubba Kush

Flower / Indica

THC 22.0%

$46.00 / 1/8 oz

Earthy and hash-like in a completely fictional way. Crimson Bubba Kush is Ala...

by Crimson Harvest Farms

Magnolia Obama Runtz

Flower / Hybrid

THC 29.5%

$62.00 / 1/8 oz

Presidential in name, fictional in nature. Magnolia Obama Runtz carries the s...

by Crimson Ridge Flower Co

Satire Ends Here

While the rest of this site is a joke, cannabis prohibition is not funny. Opiates and hard drugs are devastating communities. Cannabis is not the enemy. Here's how to take real action in Alabama:

Advocacy Organizations

NORML National

The nation's largest cannabis advocacy organization, working to reform marijuana laws since 1970.

Marijuana Policy Project National

The largest organization working to end marijuana prohibition in the US.

Contact Your US Senators

Federal legalization requires federal action. Tell your senators where you stand.

For state legislators, visit openstates.org — enter your address to find your representatives.

⚠️ SATIRE DISCLOSURE

This is a work of political satire. All store names, brand names, products, and events on this site are entirely fictional. Any resemblance to real businesses is coincidental. No cannabis is sold here. This site exists to highlight the absurdity of prohibition and to connect people with real advocacy resources.

Questions or concerns? Contact us

Anniston Altitude Shop

Products at This Fake Store

Satire Ends Here

Advocacy Organizations

Contact Your US Senators

Other States Also Waiting for Legalization

FREE STATES — Where Adults Can Legally Enjoy Cannabis